Expectation: This is so exciting–you finally have a chance to try all of the Pinterest recipes you’ve wanted to try! You will totally win everyone over with your cooking and baking skills, and making dinner instead of going to the disgusting dining hall is going to amazing.
Reality: Every ingredient for any recipe on Pinterest is expensive and/or impossible to find. That organic mozzarella for that one recipe? $15. Do you know how much vodka that could buy? That rare Brazilian fruit for that smoothie? Well, the nearest Brazilian market is two hours away. Additionally, each of these recipes takes about three hours. Ain’t nobody got time for that. And remember those times you burned toast? Try baking real food. Chinese takeout it will be…every night.
Expectation: Now that you don’t have an RA, you can finally throw huge pregames. You can invite all of your sisters, their boyfriends, those cute guys from your French class, everyone.
Reality: You throw one real pregame–and then decide that spending hours the next day cleaning up strangers’ Solo cups and the cost of replacing that broken lamp will be in no way worth it to do it again.
Going To Class
Expectation: Walking to classes is going to burn so many calories that you won’t even need to go to the gym.
Reality: There’s no way you’re walking that far with a hangover. You’ll drive instead. But your apartment isn’t far enough to get a commuter parking permit and you’ll get parking tickets almost every day, until you just stop going to class altogether until finals.
Expectation: He told you he would respond to anything that needs to be fixed within 24 hours, which is way better than campus maintenance.
Reality: He has never fixed a single thing in your apartment, possibly even in the past decade. In fact, the only time you’ve ever seen him was when he let himself in without knocking when you were getting out of the shower.
Expectation: You will have so much more room for crafting, and it will be amazing. Future Little, G-Little, and GG, you will be so spoiled.
Reality: You will spill enough glitter and paint on your carpet that you can kiss that security deposit goodbye.