Ever since I was a little Stefon, I always dreamed of flying in a private jet like Brit-Brit or Beyoncé or The Spice Girls. (But not like Aaliyah. RIP, betch.)
I dreamed of flying in the lap of luxury: sitting in comfortable chairs, surrounded by lavish decor and food. I dreamed of personal entertainment screens, space, and beautiful toilets as opposed to getting harassed in a two-hour-long TSA screening line, just so I could sit in a dank coach seat, crammed between two of my best (read: fattest) friends, one of whom has the whooping cough, with a baby crying behind me and kicking my seat all the way from LA to Cancún. And trust me, I’ve seen what goes down in an airplane bathroom. I’ve LIVED it–there’s no WAY I’m using one of those things.
Well, for those of us too poor to fly private, here’s a way to fly in style for, sometimes, just less than the cost of a coach seat. They’re called “empty legs,” and they happen after a private jet drops off Jay and Bey in Cannes, but have nobody to take on their next leg from Cannes to Miami, where they’re picking up Bieber to take him to Bali, or Fiji, or wherever the fuck they take rich, crazy kids. Almost half the time, these planes don’t have passengers for the way back, so they offer their seats to regular people like you and me at discounts of up to 75 percent.
Private jet charters like PrivateFly, JetSuite, and Victor often list cancellations and last-minute deals that you can book. If you can fly and travel last minute and find flights at the right time, you can get a smashing deal. Simply smashing.
For example, according to The Telegraph , PrivateFly offered a flight from London to Cannes for about $283 per person. That’s a $300 flight for a coach seat on a major airline. What about New Jersey to the Bahamas for $179 per person and from LAX to Cabo for $124 per person, according to the New York Post? Not a bad deal.
Those are some MASSIVE savings, and you can’t even imagine what you’re getting in return: security checks that take minutes, arriving 10 or 15 minutes before the flight leaves, bringing pets or irregularly-sized luggage or other, well, “restricted” items…like liquids more than 3.4 ounces! Plus, they fly to crazy locations. Did you know you can fly from NYC to The Hamptons? That’s a drive that takes a freaking hour, but people do it. It’s the only way to travel.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to jet. Tata!
[via Huffington Post]