You Aren’t Fully Over Your Ex If You Still Do These 4 Things


So you just got out of a long term relationship with someone you clocked in a few years with (maybe even someone you were planning a future with) and you are back to square one. Being single again, trying endlessly to get over your ex and distracting yourself from the sudden change in your relationship status is hard. It’s hard to get over your ex, especially if you had a really strong connection with them and even more so if the relationship ended badly. It’s definitely harder if you’re the dumpee than if you’re dumper. You do recover and you do get better, and you can even say “I am totally over him” after a few months, but is it actually true? Not if you’re doing this.

1. You Still Check To See If He Looks At Your Social Media

If you are still checking your snap story to see if he has looked at it, checking if he still follows you on Instagram and Twitter, or even if he has liked anything you’ve posted on Facebook, you are not totally over him. You do these things because you want to know if he is thinking about you or even if he is interested in your life at all. You also hope he sees whatever the hell you posted (whether it be your cat, a hot selfie or an alcoholic beverage you are consuming with tons of your friends) and gets a little jealous or nostalgic, thinking about you and your relationship. He’s not.

2. You Still Bitch And Complain About Him

“He is such a fucking douche bag I can’t believe I ever dated him.”
“Can you believe he cheated on me with her? He is a piece of shit.”

If you have said anything like this recently to any of your friends, family or co-workers, you aren’t completely over your ex. If thinking about what he did to you still pisses you off enough to still bitch about his sorry ass, you are still bothered and hurt by it. The day you just shrug and say “yeah, it is what it is,” when someone asks you about it, is the day you know you are for real over him. Oh and also, whenever someone asks you about it and you don’t feel like punching his face in, congratulations, you have moved on.

3. You Still Creep On His Social Media

If you still creep on his Instagram, Facebook or Twitter to see if he has posted anything about being with a new girl or just to check up on his life, you’re not over him. If you check Snapchat solely to see if he posted a story, and you watch that story more than once, you are not over him. You are still interested in what he is doing and you know deep down you are kinda hoping he is miserable or regretting dumping you. You want to see if he’s posted anything with a new girl, and if they look as cute as you two did. The day when you go on social media and your first instinct isn’t to creep on your ex, you are on your way.

4. If Seeing Something That Reminds You of Him Makes Your Heart Sink

Seeing pictures of him with his new girlfriend, finding a note he wrote you when you were together, seeing old pictures of you two or seeing old gifts he bought you — all of these things have an emotional hold on you when you still have feelings for this person. If someone telling you something about them upsets you or makes you feel sick, you are not over your ex. When you see him with his new girlfriend or you look at old pictures and you feel absolutely nothing, you are over your ex. When you can give away old gifts or put them away in a box and never feel the urge to look at them again, you are over your ex.

One day it will feel 100 percent better. You will be able to talk about it without anger and sadness, you will be able to look back on your relationship and not feel sadness and you will be able to see him with someone else and feel nothing. When you stop worrying about him thinking about you and missing you and doing everything for yourself (instead of doing it so he can see it), you will be so much happier.

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I'm Ashley and I get wine drunk by myself more than I should, eat my weight in tacos and make bad choices. I'm a ball at parties and only slightly embarrassing. Enjoy the shit I write. xoxo.

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