College is a life-altering time. It’s when young adults are sent away from what they’ve know for their whole lives to find their passions and find themselves. This self-discovery is important, because it will impact the way you make decisions from here on out. How will you treat your friends? How will you treat relationships? This may be a daunting task for women our age, but the good news is there are only four types of women: Carries, Charlottes, Mirandas, and Samanthas.
Before you can start living your most authentic life, you have to figure out which of the four predetermined life paths that are available to women. If you watch the show (which you should be required for all women), you will more easily be able to choose which character you are drawn to. This isn’t who you wish you were. It’s who you are deep down in your soul. This is the woman that lives inside of you that determines all of your innermost beliefs and morals. Let’s break them down:
Girl Next Door
Carrie is the everyday girl, just with a better shoe closet. She has her struggles but after a glass of wine and a bitchfest with her friends, she carries on (hehe get it?). She is confident and isn’t afraid of putting herself out there, even when it seems like it only ends badly. Carrie is obsessed with fashion, but in less of a materialistic way and more of an appreciative-of-the-art way. She doesn’t create the drama, but it seems to constantly follow her, and she always has a story to tell. She isn’t always the life of the party, but she is well-liked by everyone. Well, almost everyone.
- Optimistic, almost to a fault
- Occasionally self-centered
Classic Carrie quote: “Maybe some women aren’t meant to be tamed. Maybe they need to run free until they find someone just as wild to run with.”
The “Relationship” Girl
Charlotte was born to be a trophy wife. She was the little girl who wanted to be a princess when she grew up. Her classic good looks and innate innocence make her just the girl you want to take home to mama. Charlotte was in a sorority in college (KKG), so that’s a plus. She spends most of her time thinking and talking about love, but her passion for art shows that she is still a multi-dimensional person. She avoids conflicts, but when she needs to stand up for herself, she will. She likes her private (read: sex) life private, but sometimes she just wants to get fucked, you know? Just really fucked!
- Proper, borderline snobby at times
- Makes rules for herself
- Believes in love
Classic Charlotte quote: “I’ve been dating since I was 15. Where is he?”
Most Likely To Succeed
Miranda is focused and driven. She gets what she wants and does not take “no” for an answer. She is often cynical and doesn’t believe in the goodness of others, like Carrie and Charlotte do. As hard and abrasive as she comes off, she still needs love too. She puts her work before everyone, including herself, which makes it even harder to get close to people, thus perpetuating her stubborn, single life. She doesn’t let anyone in the office push her around, especially since she works in a male-dominated field. She hates the general public, but will do anything for her friends and family. Everyone acts like it sucks to be Miranda, but honestly she is killing it. She ends up with a great career, a great family, and great friends. Not a bad deal.
Classic Miranda quote: “Sexy is what I try to get them to see me as after I win them over with my personality.”
Samantha Jones is what every woman wishes they could be, whether they know it or not. She could catch a dick with the snap of her fingers and send him on his way before he can get his boxers back on without thinking twice. It’s literally the dream. But when she falls, she falls hard. She fiercely defends herself and her friends, and looks effortless while doing it.
Classic Samantha quote: “I’ve never been friends with a man. Women are for friendships and men are for fucking.”
So if you want to live your best life, decide right now, which one are you?.