What To Buy Your Boyfriend For Christmas

1/4 Zip Pebble Pile Pullover Fleece

If there is one thing on this list that you NEED your boyfriend to have, it’s this fleece. It is the comfiest, snuggliest, softest sweatshirt I’ve ever felt. Perfect for “borrowing” every time you go to his house, and when he wears it, you won’t be able to keep your hands off him. We have this in the office, and sometimes, I just hug it to know what love feels like.


Your boyfriend has got to stop wearing boat shoes. I’m sorry, but he’s fucking got to. I mean, at a frat party, it’s one thing, but somewhere that your parents are going to see his feet is quite another. These Derek Penney drivers are really nice, without being overly flashy.

A Watch



A watch says two things about a guy:

“I’m a man.”
“I have a girlfriend who bought this for me.”

Both are messages you want your boyfriend putting out into the world. If your guy’s not too flashy, a nice leather strap watch will be perfect for him. He won’t feel like you’re trying to “take over” his style, but kind of you are. Two really great options are this Jack Mason white dial watch which I tend to prefer, or the blue face for a super masculine look if your dude does not fuck around.


Nothing looks sexier on a man than a henley. (Say it louder for the people in the back.) NOTHING. LOOKS. SEXIER. ON. A. MAN. THAN. A. HENLEY. They just hug the muscles and look really fly at all times. Trust me, he will appreciate how much you appreciate him in this.

Christmas Sweater


It’s always a classic to get some one Christmas gear for Christmas. This will absolutely be something your man needs this holiday season, and I’ll be damned if two reindeer fucking isn’t how he wants to celebrate the birth of Jesus.

Patriotic Beanie

How’s the whole world ever going to know your man is a true fucking patriot in the winter time when all his clothes are covered with coats and whatnot? Umm, with this beanie, which is both hilarious, and functional. You’re welcome.

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Veronica Ruckh

Veronica (@VeronicaRuckh) is the Director of Total Sorority Move for Grandex, Inc. After having spent her undergraduate years drinking $4 double LITs on a patio and drunk texting away potential suitors, she managed to graduate with an impressive GPA and an unimpressive engagement ring -- so unimpressive, in fact, some might say it's not there at all. Veronica has since been fulfilling her duties as "America's big," a title she gave to herself with the help of her giant ego. She has recently switched from vodka to wine on weekdays. Email her at

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