We’ve Literally Found The Secret To Having Sex In Public

Hooking Up Playpants

People have sex in weird places. Cars, bars, dressing rooms, bathrooms, whatever. You’re hanging out, making serious eye contact with your significant other (or hey, maybe it’s a random, no judgement), when all of a sudden, you get that feeling. You know the one. The aching, burning, animalistic desire that can only mean one thing. You need to get it on, and you need to get it on right freaking now.

Despite the fact that we’re all horny assholes, there are a few things that hinder us from boning all over the place. First of all, I think it’s illegal. But whatever, laws never bothered me anyway. The biggest obstacle to overcome is the how. How will you get it, well, in? Sure you can sneak into the restroom, or do some gymnastics moves and get to the back seat of the car, but then what? You’re wearing tights, jeans, or worst of all, a romper. Most clothes don’t come with an easy-access fuck hole, which makes spontaneous sex hard (LOL).

Until now.

Enter (or get entered, thanks to) Playpants.

Basically they’re a pair of jeans with “completely unzippable pockets.” Which is funny because after seeing these bad boys, you’ll wonder how anyone would get laid in them.

Despite their laughably hideous appearance, these sex pants are gathering interest from sick, sick people. According to Daily Mail, the product has earned close to $15,500 from about seventy backers. So literally, seventy people were like “this is a good idea,” and decided to throw money at them. Which is mind blowing. Luckily, they provided a video to help us understand.

Yeah. What the actual fuck. Apparently the creator feels like these pants will come in handy in times such as, “itchy private parts in public, a lonely single night at the cinema, a boring corporate meeting, and a dull love life.”

The main thing that I don’t understand is why people need these pants anyway? Sure easy access but, I thought everyone knew by now: The best pants are no pants.

[via Daily Mail]

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Rachel Varina

(yeahokaywhat) Aspiring to be the next Tina Fey, Rachel spends her free time doing nothing to reach that goal. While judging people based on how they use "they're" vs. "there" on social media, she likes eating buffalo chicken dip, watching other people's Netflix, and wearing sweatpants way more than is socially acceptable.

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