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Utah Considers Passing Medical Marijuana, Is Warned Of Statewide Stoned Rabbits

Utah Considers Passing Medical Marijuana, Is Warned Of Statewide Stoned Rabbits

*Disclaimer: You’re going to want to be high for this story.*

Utah is considering getting in on the party and joining the other 23 states that currently have laws legalizing marijuana in some form. Potheads throughout the state are giving a lazy thumbs up and saying something along the lines of, “Duuuuuuuude!” The only problem? If the bill passes, some are concerned that the state’s wildlife may develop a taste for the plant.

You might be asking yourself, what’s wrong with wildlife adapting to marijuana growth? Excellent question, scholar. The DEA fears that wildlife, primarily rabbits, will eat the plant, get super high, and lose their fear of humans. In short, they’re afraid that bunnies won’t run away from people like they normally do, since they’ll be blazed out of their tiny bunny minds.

This poses a very important question: WHO THE FUCK WOULDN’T WANT STONED BUNNIES RUNNING AROUND 24/7? Seriously, does that not sound like the most adorably chill thing ever? I fail to see a problem in this plan, Utah.

Regardless, I think we’re making some serious strides here. It wasn’t too long ago that people referred to marijuana as “the devil’s lettuce” and blamed it for stumping intellectual growth, which anybody who’s had a joint and a wifi connection knows is totally false. Now the worst known side effect that they can come up with is “Shit, guys, now all the rabbits are gonna get super high and want us to pet them!” I fully support a rabbit’s right to wake ‘n bake, and if you were any fun, you would too.

[via The Washington Post]

Image via Wikipedia

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Lucky Jo

Lucky Jo is a former and current TSM writer who likes her men how she likes her coffee: way too hot and unforgivably bitter. She graduated from the University of Missouri in 2016, proving that C's do in fact get degrees. She now spends her days working for a social media marketing agency, hiking with her dachshund, and trying to bring back the scrunchie. Hate mail and goat memes can be sent to lucyjmulvihill@gmail.com.

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