Deciding how you’re going to decorate your graduation cap is a big effing deal. When I went through graduation I had multiple mental breakdowns over how, exactly, I was going to design my expensive piece of canvas. I felt that it was a metaphor for my life, my last chance to express myself as an undergrad. If I messed up — my future was bound to be a mess. Did it make sense? No. But did I allow that thought to take hold of me and cause me to sob endlessly to my little about how to incorporate The Beatles and Harry Potter and Pi Phi? Yes. Yes, I did.
Because the truth is, there are a lot of things you have to ask yourself before whipping out the glue and slapping on some glitter. Do I say something sentimental? Funny? Do I incorporate everything I love, or shove a finger in the face of the system with my loan debt amount? It’s a common epidemic that most grads face, until saying “fuck it” and slapping on some letters and calling it a day.
I chose to go with the “let’s put everything I love together on the cap and hope people get at least some of the references” route. And still, two years later, I’m throwing the picture in people’s faces because yes. I fucking killed my undergrad self over this damn cap.
Compliments and flattery accepted and encouraged.
Each and every year since then I stalk new grad caps to
compare them to mine appreciate the different trends and laugh at the funny new references. One cap that I stumbled across, however, has officially won for the best, most hilariously inappropriate cap I’ve ever seen.
Enter: the University of Central Florida parking ticket hat.
Most schools are known for their atrocious parking situation, and if you attended UCF, your experience wasn’t complete without landing a few of those lime green pieces of hell. There weren’t enough parking spaces so we’d have to get creative and hope for the best. Sometimes we’d put an old ticket on our dash hoping that they wouldn’t ticket us again. It was a headache and the only way we could actually graduate was by paying off all of the tickets we accumulated over the four years of illegal parking. So one genius student decided to throw it back in their faces. Nothing like getting that overpriced piece of paper and saying “fuck you” to parking all at the same time. Because if we learned anything at college, it was how to be a passive-aggressive asshole without getting in trouble.
What a time to be alive..