Top 50 TSM’s Of 2015


  1. I haven’t slept with anyone all summer. I’m basically a virgin. TSM.
  2. When your 60-year-old alumnae tell you not to worry, because they were alcoholics too. TSM.
  3. My big tells me I’m pretty. TSM.
  4. Being told you’re not a “typical sorority girl” and feeling confused and offended, because you absolutely are. TSM.
  5. Deciding which underwear to wear based on who’s going to be there. TSM.
  6. “I preffed the shit out of her.” TSM.
  7. Me: *breathes*
    Standards: There’s a Panhellenic rule against that. TSM.
  8. “Are you dressing cute, or no?” TSM.
  9. Being 19 and 21 at the same time. TSM.
  10. Vodka might not be the answer, but it’s always worth a shot. TSM.
  11. Haaaaave you met my little? TSM.
  12. Sisters never let sisters’ selfies go unliked. TSM.
  13. Feeling like high school you would be terrified of the new and improved college you. TSM.
  14. “We should have pregamed.” TSM.
  15. 1: “Do you workout?”
    2: “I mean I sorority squat in like every picture.” TSTC.
  16. “YASSS” being an autocorrect suggestion in your phone. TSM.
  17. I didn’t pay for my friends. I paid for my Instagram likes. TSM.
  18. Knowing you’re over him when you stop checking to see if he watched your Snapchat story. TSM.
  19. “Can we go to Starbucks first?” TSM.
  20. “Save it and send it to me.” TSM.
  21. Frat queen, not trap queen. TSM.
  22. Preferring pre-law boys to pre-med boys, because it’s less schooling and more First Lady potential. TSM.
  23. I hope the earring I lost in his bed punctures him in his sleep. TSTC.
  24. Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because he was tall and in a good fraternity, and he’ll probably text you again at 2:34am this Saturday. TSM.
  25. God grant me the serenity to accept the grades I cannot change, courage to raise the grades I can, and wisdom to know the difference. TSM.
  26. Having more sorority t-shirts than college t-shirts. TSM.
  27. Buying the t-shirt even though you didn’t go to the event. TSM.
  28. Never Have I Ever basically just being a way to call out your friends on the embarrassing shit they’ve done. TSTC.
  29. Looking pretty. Getting shitty. TSM.
  30. Can I put “highly skilled at taking care of drunk girls” on my resume? TSM.
  31. Vodka treats me better than he ever did. TSM.
  32. Always drunk, never in love. TSM.
  33. “She had a cocktail in her hand and confetti in her hair.” -Kate Spade. TSM.
  34. “Hi. We’ve met seven times, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen you sober.” TSM.
  35. Passive aggressively withholding Instagram likes. TSM.
  36. Deleting drunk texts so sober you doesn’t have to relive the shame. TSM.
  37. Getting slightly depressed watching your tan fade. TSM.
  38. “Yes, I’m wearing shorts.” TSM.
  39. Patiently waiting for legging season. TSM.
  40. Calculating what you need on the final to pass the class is an essential part of the studying process. TSM.
  41. Life in leggings. TSM.
  42. I have a seat in hell with my monogram on it. TSM.
  43. Is it possible to be the love of your own life? Because same. TSM.
  44. I wish my life was as organized as my planner. TSM.
  45. Stalking yourself on Insta after someone follows you just to see what they see. TSM.
  46. He’s my ex-whatever-he-was. TSM.
  47. High GPA. High tolerance. High maintenance. TSM.
  48. Knowing your Instagram caption before the event. TSM.
  49. I’d wish him the best, but he already had it. TSM.
  50. I’m reaaaallly sorry, but could you take one more? TSM.

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