Columns

This Poor Girl Got Dumped By A Guy She Didn’t Even Know She Was Dating

Screen Shot 2014-09-04 at 9.58.22 AM

We all have those comically bad days that make us wonder if nature and karma are laughing in our faces. They’re the days that have us questioning whether the events actually transpired, or if it’s all a practical joke that will end with a reality TV show audience revealing itself and the producers presenting us with a large, cardboard check for all the trouble the producers had intentionally caused.

I recently had a pretty stressful day at work and needed to attempt to make headway on personal projects, but I was brain dead, hungry, and generally not in love with the world. So, a typical NYC day.

To attempt to be productive, I decided I was going to hit up one of my favorite dive bars in Union Square. The place isn’t pitch black and it has relatively clean tables where you can get work done, but most importantly, it doesn’t have a kitchen so they let you bring in your own food.

I went to a Chinese food place around the corner, renowned for its amazing, cheap dumplings, and got a double order of steamed deliciousness that I planned on inhaling in the quiet solitude of the bar. After arriving, I ordered my drink of choice (double vodka soda) and began editing. By the time I was halfway done with my work, I was quite drunk, full, and alone in a crowded bar with 15 or so people singing “Happy Birthday” to the bartender.

Still brain dead, I returned home, took a lovely shower, and collapsed in my room where I could stare at the traffic passing underneath my window as a therapeutic measure.

Then, I saw one of the guys I was dating was calling me. This was nothing out of the ordinary–I occasionally called him when I was drunk and assumed it was the same deal. But nope, he was stone cold sober and asked what I had done earlier that evening. I told him the truth: that I had gone to a dive bar to eat Chinese food. Then he dumped me. And I didn’t even know we were exclusive. So, really, a text or lack thereof would have sufficed.

Email this to a friend

sarahsolfails

To quote Dr. Seuss, "Being crazy isn't enough." Writer living in NYC.

2 Comments You must log in to comment, or create an account
Show Comments

For More Photos and Videos

Latest podcasts

Download Our App

Take TSM with you. Get

New Stories

Load More