Just a few days ago, fall started. The PSL dropped, Labor Day happened, and now, if you’re anyone who knows anything, it’s very apparent that the time to watch scary shit, plan your costumes, and consume nothing but pumpkin is officially upon us. And with Instagram-worthy costumes and calorie-filled coffee drinks come the best fall show around: American Horror Story. Tonight, the seventh season begins, and we get to delve into the scary world of cults, as Evan Peters once again graces us with his presence. So, in honor of the return of our favorite sort-of-scary but very sexy show, here’s a full recap of the past six seasons. And considering how all of the seasons are related, it would be smart of you to take notes. Because what? You were going to start taking notes for classes already? Lol.
And as for spoilers, I can’t promise anything. There might be some in here. I tried to leave them out but come on — binge on the show like the rest of us or GTFO.
American Horror Story: Murder House (Season 1)
The first season is about infidelity. The story takes place in 2011 and follows the Harmon family: psychiatrist Ben (Dylan McDermott), his wife Vivien (Connie Britton), and their teenage daughter Violet (Taissa Farmiga), who move from Boston to Los Angeles after Vivien has a miscarriage and Ben had an affair. The Harmons move into a restored mansion and soon encounter the home’s former residents, the Langdons – Constance (Jessica Lange) and her two children, Tate (Evan Peters) and Addie (Jamie Brewer) – and the disfigured Larry Harvey (Denis O’Hare). Ben and Vivien try to rekindle their relationship, as Violet, suffering from depression, finds comfort with Tate. The Langdons and Larry frequently influence the Harmons’ lives, as the family discovers that the home is haunted by the ghosts of anyone who has ever died on the property.
Best Things About Season 1:
• All of the hot undead people. Hello? The maid? Tate? The creepy person in the bondage suit (who was also Tate but whatever)? Yes. Please.
• The chick from House of Cards was Ben’s mistress, which felt like a connection between our favorite shows.
• We meet Zachary Quinto and just immediately fall in love. Same goes for Jessica Lange. And Evan Peters.
• That twist where Violet had actually killed herself?! Shit was good.
• Everyone dies but they all become ghosts and pretty much live happily-ever-after.
Worst Things About Season 1:
• Literally everyone died.
• And you sort of didn’t realize how freaky the show was going to be so you’d watch it alone at night and FTFO.
• Emma Roberts wasn’t in it.
• Tate ended up being kind of a dick, proving that even dead guys are sometimes assholes.
• Living/being dead in that house would be annoying AF which is a shame because it’s actually, really pretty.