Taylor Swift Is Magical And Got Sorted Into A Hogwarts House Because She’s Taylor Swift

Taylor Swift

It’s finally making sense as to why Taylor Swift has had so much success. It’s not because of her catchy music or insanely long legs. It’s not her high profile boyfriends or even higher profile feuds. It turns out, Taylor is magical. Like, actually magical. In a recent Twitter post, Taylor is seen with Emma Watson AKA Hermione Granger AKA the most badass witch of all literary time.

At first, I was shocked. What would Emma be doing with Taylor? According to Tom Felton (otherwise known as “Malfoy”) the two would have been friends in the wizarding world. Great friends, actually. When asked to sort the pop star into a Hogwarts house for the Huffington Post, Tom said that “Taylor Swift is far too good. We’ll say Gryffindor.”

Hear that? He thinks she’d be in the house dedicated to the brave, daring, and chivalrous. Which makes absolutely no sense. Tay has said that she hates confrontation, she writes songs to let people know the dirty details of her life, and did you see the “Bad Blood” video? Yeah, not the most chivalrous move. I’m going to have to call bullshit on this one, Tom. Emma Watson must have just gotten lost on her way to end world hunger or something.

Because if we think about it for literally a second, it’s pretty obvious that Taylor would belong in a different house. A house dedicated to cunning people. A house dedicated to doing whatever it takes to achieve your goals. Doing whatever it takes to ride to the top. I’m sure Tom only said Gryffindor because he didn’t want to have to deal with Tay in his own house. Besides, with her bitchy ways and his good looks, there’s no way that they wouldn’t have hooked up. I’m pretty sure what it comes down to is that he was protecting himself from having a song written about him.

Nice try, but I’m going to have to say it’s Slytherin house for you, Taylor Swift. Sorry Tom.

[via Huffington Post, Huffington Post]

Image via a katz /

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Rachel Varina

(yeahokaywhat) Aspiring to be the next Tina Fey, Rachel spends her free time doing nothing to reach that goal. While judging people based on how they use "they're" vs. "there" on social media, she likes eating buffalo chicken dip, watching other people's Netflix, and wearing sweatpants way more than is socially acceptable.

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