Love at first sight exists. Relationships at first sight do not. There have been multiple boys who I’ve fallen for the second I finished six vodka cranberries, and set eyes on them across the bar. Turning those boys into boyfriends, however, was another story. On the same note, I knew my little the second I saw her walk into the house during recruitment. Except, at the time, she was a PNM, just like the boy aforementioned was nothing but a drunk hookup.
For the longest time, the idea of turning a hookup friend into a boyfriend, and a potential little into a little, seemed like two completely separate matters. But the more I compared my strategy for locking down both, the more I realized something. While I was definitely 100% more sober when I met my little, and while I definitely didn’t craft for my boyfriend, the process of locking down a boyfriend and locking down a little are one and the same, and the following 5 steps are significant milestones in the success of both relationships.
1. The first picture
Posting a couples picture on Instagram is a girl’s way of marking her territory, and every girl knows that a girl’s picture with “this guy,” means “that guy,” is off limits. The same rule goes for getting a little. From the day you meet the girl you know will be your little, the first Instagram with her on Bid Night is crucial to securing your title as her big.
Similarly, nothing makes a potential big’s heart drop like seeing her potential little in an Instagram with another girl. Watching a girl in your pledge class swooping in on your future little is like watching a girl in your pledge class swooping in on your man at a social, except you can’t even call her a slut, because she’s technically not even doing anything wrong.
2. The first date
“Hey, we’re having a pregame at my apartment this Friday, if you’re free you should totally come!”
You might be sending the above text to a potential little or you might be sending it to a potential boyfriend, both are equally likely. But takes way more balls to send to a potential little, because unlike a potential boyfriend, she is a girl, and therefore overthinks every text. Sending this text to a potential little is the equivalent of John Cusack holding up a stereo playing, “In Your Eyes,” in “Say Anything.” You may as well say “I LIKE YOU. PICK ME. CHOOSE ME.” If you send this text to a boy he’ll think, “Word, I’ll see if I can make it.”
3. Getting wasted together for the first time
The next step is obviously getting wasted at said pregame. Studies show that 90% of successful big/little relationships are formed in a fraternity basement, at the bottom of the handle of tequila that you stole from the kitchen upstairs.
This is when it’s actually easier to lock down a guy than a little, because the next step with a guy is a hookup, and it’s fairly easy to win him over. When locking down a little, she actually has to fall in love with you over slices of pizza in a cab back home, as opposed to a guy who at this point in the night would fall in love simply because your clothes will come off in the near future.
In any relationship with a guy, there comes a point where it seems too good to be true. He’s been nothing but sweet, loves all your friends, and you’re “exclusively” seeing each other…but he just “liked” his ex’s Instagram. Why did he like her Instagram? It was from 3 weeks ago!! And why did your potential little just go to lunch with a girl from your pledge class two weeks before big/little reveal? And why are you freaking out about things that don’t matter?
5. Low key (or high key) insanely in love when they’re finally yours
The light at the end of the tunnel in locking down a guy is when he’s actually locked down, and all your waiting has paid off and you’re officially his girlfriend and you’re so happy you could scream from the rooftops. Word to the wise: don’t actually do this, because you’d be “crazy,” and “mentally unstable.”
This is where locking down a little beats locking down a guy, any day of the week, any time, any place. You want to shout about her being your little? That’s what Big/Little Reveal IS. It’s shouting about being big/little. You can even make a poster announcing to the world that your little is your little. You want pictures of your new little running into your arms? Hello, that’s what her grandbig’s entire role is at Reveal. You want to text literally all day and all night about nothing? Wonderful, so does she.
So, jury’s out on which is easier: locking down the future husband or locking down the future MOH. However, until a guy lets me jump up and down in costume shouting about being bf/gf with posters, asks his brother to take candid pictures of me running into his arms, and texts me from every class, party, and family function, I’ll take locking down a little over locking down a guy any day..