I Haven’t Planned My Wedding In My Head And I Feel Like I Can’t Relate To Girls Because Of It

Wedding Planning

I see it all the time. Pinterest boards. Retweets. Facebook shares. Girls fantasizing about their weddings when they aren’t even in a serious relationship yet. I think God forgot to put the romance chip in me, because I hate dating, I hate mushy-gushy couples. I know some of you are rolling your eyes at me, calling me a bitter hag, but I’m actually a pretty happy-go-lucky gal! I just seem to get more excited about when people get a full time job with benefits than when people announce they are getting married. Because when you get married at 22, do you even know how to balance a checkbook? And if you do know how to balance a check book, can you teach me?

“Every girl dreams about her wedding day,” is something I’ve heard in movies, everyday conversation, and from my friends. But like, I don’t. I am 22 years old, and I don’t have anything about my possible wedding day planned out. Who has time to plan their wedding (that may never even happen) when I can’t even decide which nail color I am going to go with this time?

“I want a lace dress. I want an open bar. I want mason jars on the tables for center pieces.” These are not my wishes, but they are things I have seen on a Pinterest board or two. Or a thousand. I even created a Pinterest because I thought I was missing out on something. I thought, “maybe if I give into a little bit of the love temptation I would be like the others. I could relate to them about “the big day” and not feel like I’m a stone cold robot with no heart.”

The only thing downloading Pinterest did for me was use my data and annoy me when people saved my workout pins.

I’ve always known I was different than most girls. I hang out with a lot of guys that I don’t have sex with. But I recently realized how bad it was when I read a Facebook status from an acquaintance announcing she was getting married. The status started something like this:

“When I went to college, I prayed that God would send me a man.”

I think I choked on my coffee when I read that. Is this how the other half really lives? I read it 10 times with a dumbfounded look on my face until I remembered A LOT of girls go to college with the hopes of finding a husband. It just doesn’t make sense to me. If I’m praying to God for anything in college, it’s that I don’t fail a test, don’t accidentally sleep through a class where attendance is mandatory, and get a full time job when I graduate.

Maybe I haven’t planned my wedding day in my head because I know I’m nowhere near ready to get married. Maybe I haven’t planned my wedding day in my head because I have some personal life goals I want to achieve before becoming someone else’s wife. MAYBE, just MAYBE I haven’t planned my wedding day because I know if I had to choose right now, I would get a funfetti cake and I would want my first dance to be to 99 Problems by Jay-Z or to Gold Digger by Kanye West.

Actually now that I think about it, maybe I will start planning my wedding. I’m a girl after all.

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