Rejection sucks. And it doesn’t matter if you were dating a guy for three years or only talking for a couple weeks. It still fucking hurts. And unfortunately, I know this feeling all too well. At first, it starts out with you thinking: well screw that guy, it’s his loss. And then it easily turns into you crying every night watching The Notebook wondering when your Noah will come along. Or your Cal. Or anyone, really. But I’m here to tell all the other girls out there like me: as cliché as it sounds, it all happens for a reason.
It all started my sophomore year of college. There had been this guy that I had a crush on for over a year. I was just always too scared to make a move. It wasn’t until one night when I overheard one of my sorority sisters saying she wanted to fuck him that I realized I needed to do something. And fast. So one night at a party I took him into a room and spilled my guts. To tell someone how you feel is the most gut-wrenching and amazing feeling. But what made it even worse was that he said he needed time to think all this through. That he had feelings for me but that there was something in his way. And I knew exactly who it was: my sorority sister. He said he’d think about it over winter break. So I respected that and gave him space.
Two weeks later he posts a picture with the girl in my house. So his choice was obvious.
Junior year of college was a fresh start. I became really close with one of my guy friends and finally started to feel like Lizzie McGuire and Gordo. I decided I needed to make a move because he certainly wasn’t after being Gordo-zoned. So I went to his house one night and once again, with sweaty hands and a nervous heart, told him how I felt. I thought this time would be it. But he looked at me sadly and said he had just started to see another girl. That he didn’t know if it would go anywhere with her, but he just needed to think about all this. And think he did. And he didn’t choose me.
This most recent rejection happened after my heart had finally started to recover. This hot guy and I started texting and seeing each other a few times during the week. Things were going great until one night I was waiting for him to text me back. I figured he was out getting drunk with friends so I didn’t want to bother him with a double text. Next thing I know my friend is telling me she just saw him with a younger member in my sorority and that he was taking her on their weekend long date function. And that was the end of that.
So what’s it like being the girl that never gets picked? It royally fucking sucks. I will not lie. But at the end of the day, I know that all these “flings” didn’t work out for a reason. Call it fate or whatever you want. But sometimes guys reject you for your own good. Mine was. Guy number one cheated on his girlfriend, guy number two became a fat drunk, and guy number three has insane baggage. So now looking back at all these, I’m glad I was rejected because I could have been the girl who got cheated on. Or worse, got stuck with a slob for a boyfriend.
What I’m trying to say is that even though it may not seem like it, one day a guy will come along that is going to treat you the way you deserve. Mine hasn’t come along yet. But I’m done crying in the shower about all the times I’ve never been chosen. It doesn’t change anything. Girls like me need to realize we don’t need that shit in our life. Be thankful that certain douchebags didn’t want you, because maybe down the road you wouldn’t have wanted him. One day everything will work out and you’ll finally find your Noah Calhoun. In the mean time be Allie pre-Noah. A bad bitch who makes a guy climb a Ferris wheel to ask for a date. Eventually one day you’ll have a smoking hot husband who’ll build a house for you. Just be patient..
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