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How To Get Hotter In Three Hours

How To Get Hotter In Three Hours

Brows are the most important facial feature hands down. They frame your whole face, and can turn a five into a seven. Not saying any of you are fives though, because you’re all like really pretty.

As a girl with naturally thick eyebrows, I started over-plucking and waxing the shit out of them in middle school, and they were never the same again (RIP Standards Concern’s eyebrows: 1996-2007.) The whole concept of “brows on fleek” rolled around, and suddenly I couldn’t survive without my Anastasia brow pencil every morning. The main problems for this method of filling in patchy or otherwise thin brows are as follows:

1. You have to spend like an hour every morning filling them in.
2. Your hookup is going to think you are weird as fuck for running to the bathroom every morning while screaming “Don’t look at my face!” so you can fill them in before he sees that disaster aka your natural brows.
3. If you sweat, game over.

So what’s a girl to do? Microblade that shit. Now, I know what you’re probably thinking. “But my eyebrows are fine, and I really don’t want a blade near my face until I’m like forty and ready for my first face lift.” Microblading is actually a fairly painless procedure and involves a tool comprised of a few blades so tiny I found myself asking my amazing technician Rickie if it was even in yet (just like with my ex!). Although to be fair, according to her I’m a “bad bitch” and needed less topical numbing than her usual clients. Maybe I’m a psycho and enjoy the pain, but that’s a whole other convo reserved for my therapist. Almost every celebrity has microbladed eyebrows from the Kardashian/Jenners to Bella Thorne (a fellow psycho bitch) to those laxative tea selling insta models.

So here’s a rundown of the process. First, the technician draws out your ideal brows; this should actually be the most time consuming part of the appointment. I brought in a few Instagram pictures of girls whose eyebrows I liked for reference, and it took about an hour and a half to get everything lined up and measured out perfectly. Next, the technician applies a topical numbing crème, and you wait a few minutes for it to set in. Finally, the microblading process begins. This process is usually repeated twice in a session. The technician runs the blade over your brows to create strokes similar in appearance to natural hairs. She then fills it over with ink and allows it to absorb. Repeat this process over again, and voila. You’ll be posting snapchats in no time with annoying captions like “I woke up like this.”

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