Here’s A Naked Chrissy Teigen — #BoobGoals

Here's A Naked Chrissy Teigen -- #BoobGoals

The way I see it, if you don’t love Chrissy Teigen, you’re wrong. I didn’t get it for awhile, I’ll admit that. But I really like when hot girls don’t make “being hot” their only schtick. Sure, it’s ultimately reason she got to where she is, being a model and all, but she just feels like someone I could hang out with. She did a comedy video with Amy Schumer for fuck’s sake. I once said in a meeting with advertisers that I would go down on Amy Schumer if it was asked of me — for business purposes, of course. My point is, if she’s good enough for Queen Amy, she’s good enough for me.

But then Chrissy does something that would so NOT be okay if one of my friends did it. She posted a nudie to Instagram.

Chrissy Teigen

The cardinal rule of nudes is not to put your face in them, and to only send them to your boyfriend, and then pretend to be offended when he shows his friends, when really, you’re flattered, because duh, you look hot and he wanted to show you off. Chrissy is just giving no fucks here. It’s been like fifteen minutes, and the uncensored photo remains on her Instagram page, and I can feel the wrath of Chelsea Handler, whose topless photos have been removed from Instagram countless times, as we speak.

Image via Tinseltown /

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Veronica Ruckh

Veronica (@VeronicaRuckh) is the Director of Total Sorority Move for Grandex, Inc. After having spent her undergraduate years drinking $4 double LITs on a patio and drunk texting away potential suitors, she managed to graduate with an impressive GPA and an unimpressive engagement ring -- so unimpressive, in fact, some might say it's not there at all. Veronica has since been fulfilling her duties as "America's big," a title she gave to herself with the help of her giant ego. She has recently switched from vodka to wine on weekdays. Email her at

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