Genuine Advice I Wish I Had Known Before Recruitment

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Recruitment is stressful, and a little bit of advice goes a long way.

1. Just because your mom/best friend/sister/favorite teacher was in a certain sorority (either at that school or at a different school) and had an amazing time, it doesn’t mean you will automatically have an awesome time there, too.
Sororities change reputations, attitudes, and personalities all the time as they cycle in and out new pledge classes. Twenty years ago, that sorority may have been perfect for your mom. Four years ago, it may have been perfect for your sister. But this year, recruitment is about YOU. Forget what everyone else says. Go to the parties, meet the girls, and decide at the end of each day which girls you genuinely clicked with, were impressed by, and actually would want to hang out with every day.

2. There is no such thing as “tiers” or “popular” in college.
You graduated high school, so leave the high school drama and shit behind you. You are coming into this huge new place, full of people you don’t know. You’re probably a little scared and desperate to make the “right” choice, but at a school with 50,000–or even just 5,000–people, there is no possible way for any sorority to be full of solely “popular” girls who everyone likes. It is actually impossible for anyone to have hundreds of legitimate friends. That being said, join the sorority you actually like with the girls you actually like. Whichever group you join, if you decide based on the people rather than reputation or rumors, you will make a ton of new friends who you actually get along with. If you join a “top” house just because you’re scared to be in a “bottom” house, you will end up regretting it when you feel like an outsider–you’ll end up finding most of your friends in other houses anyway. Save yourself the confusion and choose the group you click with the first time.

3. DON’T spend the rest of this summer trying to starve yourself, work out a ton, tan as much as you can, or change yourself in any way.
A lot of people will tell you that you need to be yourself, but your best self. I call bullshit on those old, uppity grannies. If you value looking exactly perfect like a tan, blonde Barbie, you would already look like that. However, if you don’t look like that, it’s probably because it’s not your biggest priority and you shouldn’t be striving to fit into a house that values different things than you do. Whichever house you fit in with the best, those girls will love you just the way you are now. DO look put together during recruitment–don’t be a slob just because you’re being naturally you. You have to put in at least a little effort.

4. Pack snacks and water with you.
It’s hot as hell and you’re going to sweat. If you don’t rehydrate and refuel, you WILL pass out–more than 20 girls passed out last year at my school during recruitment. Don’t let that be you!

5. The girls inside are more nervous than you are.
This isn’t a myth. They really are. Most of the girls who will talk to you inside the house will be sophomores with no experience in trying to convince people their house is the greatest. Also, their recruitment chair is more than likely putting a lot of pressure on them to convince you to join, so their nerves are pretty high. That said, go in smiling, kind, and calm. Take a deep breath before you walk into the house to help you take it all in without getting overwhelmed. It’s scary at first, but if you just act like yourself and be super open and kind, you won’t be nervous after the first house.

6. If you meet the recruitment chair or president, that means the chapter REALLY likes you and wants you.
The top dogs make a point to meet each of their top picks during recruitment.

7. Have a good profile picture since like, yesterday.
The girls have already started creeping on you, and at least one of them has seen your Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram, even if you think they don’t know who you are. They do. Also, it’s better to have everything private than public, even if it’s totally clean. A little mystery is good for us creepers. It’s alluring. Use it to your advantage.

8. DON’T practice what you’re going to say during parties.
Don’t try to strategize or anything. The sorority girls already know your résumé and if you parrot it to them, they will think you’re an awkward weirdo and they might even cut you that day. Be humble, tell them about the cool trip you took this summer, talk about that movie you both just saw last week, whatever. Just don’t try to convince them you’re the shit or they will–I repeat, WILL–think you are a weirdo and cut you. Just let the conversation flow naturally. It’s their job to drive the conversation, not yours. Don’t feel pressured to come up with things to say.

9. If you want to join XYZ house, tell them you want to be there.
If you’re a legacy for TriGamma but you want to be an Alpha Beta Xi, tell Alpha Beta Xi that you cut TriGamma and you absolutely want to be at Alpha Beta Xi on Bid Day and that you love hanging out with them so much. But then actually cut TriGamma. Don’t be that girl who leads on every house and ends up joining her legacy house anyway. That girl sucks.

10. Don’t ask boys which house you should join or which one is the best.
They will tell you either the slutty ones or the ones that drink a lot. I don’t know how much I can emphasize this, but go to the parties. Have normal conversations. Be your actual self. Join the house where you will be the most comfortable!

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President Kennedy

Proud mom of the rowdiest Maltipoo alive, French wine connoisseur, and enthusiastic fraternity sweetheart with too much time on her hands.

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