Formal Is Just Practice For Your Wedding Day


It seems that lately when I go on Facebook, someone new is showing off a giant rock on her left ring finger, while another is plastering wedding photos across my timeline (moment of silence for the loss of yet another single lady). As our college years come to a close, it seems like yet another step of adulthood is right around the corner: marriage. Luckily, our sorority formals have been preparing us for our wedding day all along.

The Preparation

Preceding every good formal is extensive preparation to make sure we look our best. Before formal, we go dress shopping and count on our sisters and closest friends to tell us what dresses make our butts look too big and what dresses make us look like fine as hell. Once we find the perfect dress, we stalk Pinterest for days looking for the perfect hairstyle and makeup to complement it. We insist that we aren’t eating carbs (liars) and we hit up the gym a few more times than usual. No matter what, our sisters are there to make sure we look like a knockout for the big day.

The Guy

Some of us wait YEARS before asking the formal date of our dreams who we’ve been stalking around campus since we were freshmen. Maybe when we’re juniors or seniors, we’ll finally get the (liquid) courage to ask him. Others may meet a nice guy in the line at Starbucks and within a matter of minutes, have the formal date of their dreams. Same goes for husbands, as some of us search for years, while others end up marrying the beautiful man from the Starbucks line. No matter where we meet our guy, we all know he’s just there to look good in pictures. Kidding. Sort of. But seriously, no matter where you find him, you know he’ll look good on your arm and maybe only embarrass you a few times on the dance floor.

The Pictures

Ahh, the pictures. Arguably the most important part of the night. What’s the point of spending so much time looking perfect if I can’t Instagram it? My wedding is going to have the BEST wedding hashtag for the ‘gram, so good thing I’ve had years of experience taking pictures at such an event. Practice circling the room and taking pictures with as many sisters as you can find will definitely prepare you for greeting and welcoming guests on the dance floor on your big day. Your sisters have also been giving you tips for years that you can use at your wedding. Whether you’re opening your eyes a little more to avoid the drunk squint, or learning how to make yourself look at least somewhat presentable when the photographer comes over right as you’re getting down to “Get Low” and the first beads of sweat start show up on your forehead. You know how to work your angles, and Facetune, to always look your best.

The Big Day

The big day arrives, and you probably kick it off by getting brunch and mimosas with a few sisters and then you jump right into the glam preparation. As the night progresses, you’ll find that you’re ready for anything the night throws at you. Most importantly: OPEN. BAR. It takes a special breed of woman to handle an open bar with class and grace — a sorority woman. For years, formals have been preparing us to get shitfaced and still keep it together (or at least not get kicked out of the venue…well, most of us). Just remember to try not to spill your drinks on your perfect dress and the enjoy the day you’ve been thinking about for months years.

The Wedding Night

The only difference here is that the next morning, you don’t have to worry about your new groom returning your texts.

Cue the champagne toast.

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