Every Senior’s Thoughts A Week Before Graduation


Graduation. The G Word. Just thinking about it makes me gag. Sadly, it is a fate that is far too quickly approaching us all. For me, the end of the world as I know it is in roughly seven days. If you’re one of the lucky ones who gets to stay a bit longer, buckle up and enjoy your time now, because the worst is yet to come!

Current Life Status:

This is the most bittersweet, stressful week of your life, hands down. You are literally a tornado of emotions on the inside. You’re excited to be moving on to something new, scared that you won’t have time to say bye to everyone, or that someone will leave before you get the chance to talk to them again, and you get that strange, depressed feeling that always comes when you’re about to leave a place for what may be the last time. There are no cakes made out of rainbows and smiles anywhere in sight and damn, do you need one right now!

Mental Spirit Animal:

Usually crying Michael Jordan, sometimes cracked out Spongebob, and occasionally John Bender because you’re leaving triumphant: you owned college.

How To Deal:

First of all, unless you have a time machine or you’re a Harry Potter character, you can’t stop time and you can’t go back. Life is moving on with or without you, so the best thing to do is roll with it. It’s scary, but whatever you do, don’t stay comfortable. While a lot of people are hesitant to change everything about their lives all at once, why not do just that? You’re moving to a new place and leaving the old one behind. You’re about to become someone new, so do it wholeheartedly. Cut your hair, throw out all your clothes and buy new ones that are truer to your style now than all the crap you’ve accumulated since freshman year. Go on that volunteer trip, dump your old boyfriend, move to a new city instead of living with your parents. Do something, anything, that will make you grow as a person and help you transition into who you really want to be. Relish the memories you made in college, but don’t let them control your future. You may be leaving school, but college you will always be there, making frat laps and lurking around your favorite old bar, making out with hot randoms, forever. People are like sharks, we have to keep moving forward, or we die, or at least get boring…and fat. Take all the passion and energy you had for college life and put it into something new, and I guarantee you’ll love it just as much. As for saying goodbye to everyone, spend the most of your time with the people who gave you the most of theirs: your sisters, your best friends, your guy friends. As for the boys you’ve loved and lost, maybe some of them can get a goodbye, but sometimes it’s best just to disappear and leave them wondering what awesome place you’ve run off to.

Theme Music:

Deep house, because it sounds like what the inside of you head feels like rn, but on a playlist with a Minnie Ripperton song thrown in once every hour just to fuck with your emotions.

Recommended Beverage:

Whatever is most likely to make you drunk cry, because you’ve just got to get it all out.

We *almost* did it!

Read Your Current Mental State Before Graduation: 1 Month Out and Your Current Mental State Before Graduation: 2 Months Out.

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PlattyBlonde is a senior who divides her time responsibly between cheap alcohol, bad boys, and worrying about her hair.

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