DJ Khaled Outlines A Typical Weekend In The Life Of A Sorority Girl

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DJ Khaled is the rising voice of this generation. He’s out here inspiring thousands daily, giving keys to success, and making sure we all take our vitamins and eat our breakfasts. For some reason we all find a bit of peace and comfort in Khaled’s daily routines. Although he’s an A-list music producer making more money than you purely on Snapchat, his iconic snaps could actually narrate your day to day routine.

You wake up in the morning and completely forgot that you have dues coming up. You call your parents up to ask for money.

After a little bit of persuading they come through with the transfer. You basically throw money at Nationals.

After watching whatever movie is on E! (probably Sex And The City), you decide you should probably get your workout in for the month. That mediocre Spring Break bod isn’t going to make itself.

….but you just end up on the elliptical for fifteen minutes. You were at the gym, it definitely counts!

After that strenuous workout, you realize you’re starving. You jet back to the house for a big meal.


Per usual, the house cook hooks it up (and has a better attitude than Chef Dee tbh).


The GroupMe starts blowing up with tonight’s plan so you begin the two hour process of getting ready.


After chiseling out your contour and picking out the perfect casual yet cute outfit, you’re finally ready for the pregame. Everyone knows the outfit didn’t count if you didn’t post it, so you ‘gram a not-so candid, slightly FaceTuned pic.


And unlike your ex’s new girlfriend, you break three digit numbers in likes. You can’t help it that you’re so popular.

After a shot or ten, texting your ex starts to sound like a reaaally good idea. Your friend tries to snap you out of it. Her pep talk sounds a lot like this:

So you decide to Snapchat to let everyone know that you’re having fun and definitely not drunk crying about that guy.

You run into a group of girls in the new pledge class and they ask to take a picture with you. *hair flip*


As the night comes to a close, it hits you: nausea.


So you put on your game face because you know Taco Bell would fix this whole mess.


After eating your weight in crunchwrap supremes, you call up a ride and head home to PTFO. But as soon as you walk through the door your PIC immediately starts to vom, so of course, you hold her hair.


You wake up the next morning ready to brunch it up when you see you got an email from standards.

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You tell your friends and they’re all like…


So you decide not to sweat it.

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You get to your hearing and they tell you all the embarrassing things you forgot you did. But you’re all like…


In reality, you know you’ll be doing the same thing again next weekend.

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“Another one.”

Image via YouTube

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Rachel Page

Rachel enjoys spending her time thinking about Britney Spears, whining about being single, and thinking about Britney Spears. She doesn't take to criticism well, so be nice or so she will cry herself to sleep! Email:

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