Miley Cyrus had one of the nicest heads of hair in Hollywood. There was a very real chance that she could have been the hair to Jennifer Aniston’s throne (I couldn’t help myself. I love puns). Then, in a horrible tragedy last year, she lost her locks to stupidity. She’s since been under close watch, but as she’s really gone off the deep end trying to shed her good girl Disney image (we GET IT. You’re not Hannah Montana anymore), the prognosis is not looking good. It seems her hair as we know it is here to say. This would have been fine. One pop superstar says toodaloo to her ‘do is unfortunate. Two, I fear, marks the beginning of an epidemic.
Queen Bey, with arguably the best hair among African American women in Hollywood (though Afros are making a comeback, and I totally support it), recently chopped off her hair in favor of a pixie cut. She took to Instagram to let the world know she’d no longer need to pat her weave, ladies. It looks fine. She can pull it off, but I’m not blown away.
The bigger problem I have here is that I fear that the hairstyle once dubbed “the Ellen” could potentially be sweeping the nation. I have been on team long hair my whole life. Just the other day, I was mourning the loss of three inches when I was so eloquently told, “Well, it’s still down to your tits. I don’t think that equates to short hair.” I’ve been thrilled that my generation was going to be the first to forego the dreaded “mom haircut,” once we reached motherhood, but now, I’m not so sure. I refuse to participate in the movement if it becomes one. Stay safe out there, girls. Length matters.