A New “Fifty Shades Of Grey” Book Is Being Released In TWO WEEKS And It’s Everything We Hoped For

50 Shades of Grey

Fifty fucking Shades of Grey. God we love that series. Sure, we know it’s complete brain candy, and yes, it’s totally unrealistic. But the thing is, we DGAF. It’s so bad that it’s good, and we just can’t help it. We’re obsessed. After the movie was released on Valentine’s Day, we kind of thought we had a year or so to catch our breaths until the next installment came out.

But in the world of S&M, things are NEVER what we expect. Duh. So, in an effort to turn our vanilla world upside down, author E.L. James decided to (randomly) release another book. It’s called “Grey” and it’s set to be published on Christian Grey’s birthday, which is June 18. Which is also like, two weeks away. Just in time to make us feel bad about our sex lives this summer.

James announced this fabulous news in an Instagram post early this morning.

If you instantly got horny, it’s okay. We all did. According to Cosmopolitan, Random House (her publisher) released a statement including the following line from her upcoming dedication: “Grey is for those readers who asked…and asked… and asked… and asked for this.” Apparently this book will answer things like why this billionaire is obsessed with a random, average-if-now-below girl, why he can’t forget her, and hopefully, how he really feels about her 1980s porn star bush. This all from the perspective of our favorite fucked rich guy.

The anticipation is truly killing us.

So, ladies, hit up the sex shop and stock up on your batteries. The new “Grey” book will be here before we know it. Sure, the fact that she announced the release two weeks before it hits the market is a little odd, but we’ll take what we can get. Will it be a literary work of genius? No. Will people complain that it’s total garbage and tries to make mental instability seem sexy? Sure thing. But will we be first in line on June 18 to get it and get off? You know it. See you in two weeks, Mr. Grey.

[via Cosmopolitan]

Image via Shutterstock

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Rachel Varina

(yeahokaywhat) Aspiring to be the next Tina Fey, Rachel spends her free time doing nothing to reach that goal. While judging people based on how they use "they're" vs. "there" on social media, she likes eating buffalo chicken dip, watching other people's Netflix, and wearing sweatpants way more than is socially acceptable.

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