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A Hilariously Honest Rendition Of “Summer Lovin'” From “Grease”

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Summer lovin’ began so fast,
It started when he poured me a glass.
Tall, dark, and handsome, decked out in pastel,
He quickly had me under his spell.
His stupid ways, during the day
But oh, oh those summer nights.

Well-a, well-a, well-a, uh!
Tell me more, tell me more
Did you play hard to get?
Tell me more, tell me more
Are you exclusive yet?

A “real” gentleman, he sweet-talked me,
But some drinks later and we were between the sheets.
Everyone told me, “don’t get attached,”
But I thought he was my perfect match.
Tons of head games and mornings of shame
But oh, oh those summer nights.

Well-a, well-a, well-a, uh!
Tell me more, tell me more
Like is he really rich?
Tell me more, tell me more
Does he have a big…stick?

The most romantic guy by far,
Proclaiming his love after twelve PBRs.
He might not know it, but I’ll be his wife one day,
I already picked out our children’s names.
Hitting new lows, and acting psycho
But oh, oh those summer nights.

Well-a, well-a, well-a, uh!
Tell me more, tell me more
It’s just a “casual fling.”
Tell me more, tell me more
But will you stay a thing?

He wasn’t ready emotionally,
Texted his ex consistently.
I tried to act like I didn’t care,
Convincing people, “It’s a real love affair!”
Stalking Facebook with a murderous look
During oh, oh those summer nights.

Well-a, well-a, well-a, uh!
Tell me more, tell me more
Did he pay for the date?
Tell me more, tell me more
How many days are you late?

He broke it off at last call,
Blaming his workload during fall.
Excuses, excuses he flung at me,
Not knowing that I completely agreed.
Great times behind, but better ahead
Oh, oh, oh those summer nights.

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Drunk but not in love

(@DrunkNOTinLove) is a die-hard Splenda addict who requires a constant supply of caffeine and male attention to make it through the day. After graduating with her degree in Economics, she now focuses her energy on adding a "Home" to her degree title by perfecting the "intelligent drunk," and conning a banker into marrying her one day. Originally from New England, she is a hardcore Boston sports fan, but only when boys are around. Almost all of her calories consumed Thursday - Saturday (and the occasional Tuesday) are from $7 bottles of Yellowtail Moscato, and in no way, shape, or form is she fazed by this. All forms of hate mail and date party inquiries can be sent to drunkbutnotinlove@gmail.com

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