5 Necessary Products For Flawless Post Hookup Makeup

5 Necessary Products For Flawless Post Hookup Makeup

Walk of Shame. Or Stride of Pride, depending on how cute the guy and satisfying experience. We’ve all had them and I think we can all admit that the worst part isn’t in fact the walk, but rather, the fact that our face looks like we just participated in a gang bang and our makeup is the definition of streaked. It’s honestly the worst. All we’re trying to do is have some fun, steal a shack shirt, and get home without people confusing our faces for a drag queen’s. But fear not, my little sluts. Through years of honing both my walk of shame and makeup skills, I’ve pinpointed the five absolutely necessary products to keep your face looking flawless, even the morning after.

1. Primer

If you aren’t using primer, do you even really do your makeup? If for some reason you are so far behind the curve that you aren’t priming your face on the daily, it’s time you start. Primer is what keeps your pores small and your foundation on your face, regardless of how much you sweat. It also helps to even out skin redness and tone your face. My favorite primer is Bare Minerals ‘Prime Time Foundation Primer’.

2. Liquid Liner

Lining your eyes is a part of any going out routine, but using a bad liner is going to guarantee that it smudges, doesn’t maintain its color, or just simply comes off after extended wear. I know it might pain you to spend $20 plus dollars on eyeliner, because drug store liner is just as good, right? Fucking wrong. Invest in your makeup now and you won’t regret it in the future. For liquid liner, the best liner I have ever used and will forever swear by is Kat Von D ‘Tattoo Liner’. An added bonus to this liner is that it features a brush tip, as opposed to normal felt tips, which I’ve found allows me to get more precise and perfect lines.

3. Mascara

There are hundreds if not thousands of mascaras available. How do you decide which one to use? Is it really worth it to spend upwards of $30 for designer mascara, like Givenchy or Saint Laurent? Can you get away with spending under $10 with drug store mascara? I’ve used a lot of different mascaras since I started wearing makeup but the absolute best mascara I’ve ever used? Benefit ‘They’re Real.’ This is hands down my favorite, not only because of how long and natural it makes my somewhat non-existent lashes look, but because it will literally never flake off. On numerous occasions, I’ve done my mascara once in the morning, gone to all day drinks, straight to the bar, and then home with a fuckbuddy, and when I woke up, my mascara was literally still perfect. I swear by this mascara and if you all only listen to one thing I say, please invest in Benefit ‘They’re Real,’ you will not regret it.

4. Finishing Powder

I have only started using a finishing powder within the last year or so, but since I have, the longevity of makeup has increased dramatically. A finishing powder is a powder that goes on after your normal face routine (foundation, contouring, highlight, etc…). It is a light, translucent powder that minimizes lines, absorbs oils, and softeners your complexion. It also helps lock in your foundation to give you longer lasting cover. An added bonus is that most finishing powders also contain SPF, normally around 25, which is obviously good long term for your face and aging. My go-to finishing powder? Bare Minerals ‘Mineral Veil.’ I use both the original and illuminating, for daily use and going out, respectively.

5. Setting Spray

Again, this is only something I’ve begun using semi-recently, but once I started, I can’t imagine not using. Setting spray is just a simple mist on spray that helps to keep your makeup perfect. The only spray I’ve ever used is Urban Decay ‘All Nighter’ and it is an absolute game changer. This product features a patented Temperature Control Technology which helps cool down your face and maintain a normal temperature throughout the night, which prevents your foundation, eyeshadow, and other makeup products from melting off. We’ve all experienced those over-crowded, sweaty frat basements and have also seen our makeup go from flawless to nothing in the span of an hour. Add in a one-night stand, and normally your makeup would be nonexistent the next day. Once I’ve started using this spray, my next morning makeup looks almost identical to when I put it on the previous day.

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Champagne Showers is a contributing writer for TSM. She is your typical Northern Diva. If curse words, sexual content, and drug use offend you, then bless your heart. CS will continue living the life you're too scared to live. email her at:

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