1. You’re convinced Chick-fil-A is a major food group. Whoever said nothing tastes as good as skinny feels obviously never tried Chick-fil-A sauce.
2. Norts and a pocket-tee isn’t an outfit. It’s a lifestyle.
3. Everything you own is monogrammed. Even though you black out more often than you should, you’re safe, because you’ll never forget your name.
4. You know Luke Bryan would be the perfect formal date.
5. You can spot a Yankee a mile away (and yes, you still use the term Yankee).
6. Miranda Lambert is your spirit animal.
7. There’s an entire section in your closet devoted to oversized tees that aren’t shack shirts, comfort colors, and PFGs. Large is the new small.
8. You never leave home without full makeup, which makes shacking a difficult endeavor.
9. Anytime Wagon Wheel comes on, you can be found on the dance floor, forcing everyone in a 5-mile vicinity to sing along.
10. Your life goal is to attend Old South with your entire lineage. You’re not above hazing the babies in your family to make sure they receive an invitation.
11. Your anthem is “Southern Girl,” “You and Tequila,” or “Gunpowder & Lead.”
12. SEC > everything. Tailgating, boys in bowties, and any excuse to day drink is perfection.
13. You’ve been to Mardi Gras at least once, even if you don’t remember it. It’s the beads that count.
14. You take out your aggression by going shooting, and you’re not sure how people who don’t manage to stay calm.
15. Your Pinterest is devoted to mason jars, wraparound porches, and your perfect plantation wedding.
16. You’ve literally clutched your pearls.
17. Your obsession with Lilly is bordering on out of control.
18. Try as you might, you can’t resist a southern accent.
19. 30A is your happy place, and you have the bumper sticker to prove it.
20. The only man you trust more than your dad is Jack Daniels.
21. You were shocked when you realized there are people in the world who have never experienced the magic of grits.
22. You feel at home in a piano bar, especially when “Friends In Low Places” plays. Or “Callin’ Baton Rouge.” Or “Wrecking Ball.” Okay, any song sounds perfect in a piano bar.
23. You’ve said, “Bless your heart” and meant it.
24. You’re far too familiar with cockroaches, and the bribery that ensues when you have to find a boy to kill one for you.
25. Cowboy boots are appropriate for every occasion, from tailgates to weddings.
26. Half your house has a double name.
27. Nothing’s a bigger turn-on than a boy who knows how to dance. You love knowing Cotillion paid off.
28. You know the meaning of “ring by spring” and have experienced more candle passing ceremonies than you can count.
29. You grew up idolizing Scarlett O’Hara. In hindsight, she might be kind of evil, but she was just so sassy.
30. It was no problem getting recs, because your mom’s in the Junior League.
31. You’re counting down the days until seersucker and sundress season.
32. It takes you an embarrassing amount of time to get ready to go anywhere, including Publix. Unlike Beyonce, you don’t just wake up like this.
33. Every boy you see on Tinder has pictures of himself fishing, hunting, and tailgating.
34. Sometimes you open your mouth and your mother comes out.
35. You wouldn’t know how to communicate without saying “y’all.”
36. You know your sorority sisters will be your bridesmaids, and that your kids will call them “aunt.”
37. Your life can be summed up by this quote: “This is the South and we’re proud of our crazy people. We don’t hide them up in the attic, we bring them right down to the living room to show them off.”