37 Reasons Why You Sort Of Hate Your Boyfriend


  1. He said he liked something that you hate.
  2. Or he said he hated something you really, really like, which is equally annoying.
  3. And you sort of want to punch him in the face every time he says he hates pesto.
  4. No one hates pesto.
  5. You Snapchatted him something sexy, but he didn’t text you about it.
  6. Which is odd, because your tits definitely deserve a response.
  7. Or an engagement ring. Whichever.
  8. It’s Wednesday. And I’m sorry. Are you not his Woman Crush or…?
  9. He changed the channel.
  10. Because apparently sports are more important than Keeping Up With The Kardashians.
  11. He said that Kylie was hot.
  12. Sure, she’s hot. But he didn’t have to say it.
  13. AND follow her on Instagram.
  14. He’s wearing that shirt you hate.
  15. The one that you know his ex bought for him.
  16. Not that you’ll tell him that. But still. You know that he knows who got it for him. You know?
  17. He said he was going to bed, but guess who’s on Facebook?
  18. And guess who just ignored your text?
  19. Two words: Guys night.
  20. Also, him having fun at guys night? What’s the shit about.
  21. The sheer fact that his exes still exist.
  22. And that no matter how hard you try, you can’t help but stalk their Instagrams. Every. Single. Day.
  23. It’s been a good ten minutes since he texted you back.
  24. And like…you get it. He’s at his dying grandmother’s house. But still…
  25. He ate your leftovers.
  26. The leftovers you were daydreaming about.
  27. The leftovers you saved for this moment after a long, hard day.
  28. The leftovers he knew you were really, embarrassingly, grossly excited about eating. He fucking ate them.
  29. Leaving the seat up like it’s his mothereffing job.
  30. He randomly texted you “I love you” which is oddly suspicious.
  31. What’s he doing? Why does he love you? Does he feel guilty about something? Is he cheating on you?
  32. He asked why you’re wearing a hat inside.
  33. And when you said “because, fashion” he rolled his eyes and snatched it off of your head.
  34. He made you give back the sweatshirt you stole.
  35. The teasing will never stop. Like, ever.
  36. And despite it all, you know that’s he’s the guy for you. No matter how many times he makes fun of you for crying at Subaru commercials or singing Adele totally off-key. You’d still rather put up with his football Sundays, his annoying-yet-lovable friends, and his total lack of understanding for anything pumpkin spice, than not put up with him at all.
  37. You know. Most of the time.

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Rachel Varina

(yeahokaywhat) Aspiring to be the next Tina Fey, Rachel spends her free time doing nothing to reach that goal. While judging people based on how they use "they're" vs. "there" on social media, she likes eating buffalo chicken dip, watching other people's Netflix, and wearing sweatpants way more than is socially acceptable.

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