You’ve had to get size 00 pants altered down so they don’t give you the appearance of a mom butt.
You’ve asked the sales associate at The Children’s Place if they carry blazers.
You’ve also been embarrassed by the sales associate at The Children’s Place when she asks how old your daughter is. Nope, just buying a tiny cardigan for myself, thanks.
You have sadly learned that XS means something different at every store.
As do sizes 00, 0, 1, and 2.
You have never been able to order anything online and you
will never be able to order anything online. Deal with it. Even Victoria’s Secret doesn’t carry a 30” band. Congratulations, your boobs will look awkward forever.
If you ever complain about being too tiny, be prepared for every woman on the planet to viciously hate your guts for all of eternity.
You dread size inflation because that means you can no longer shop at half of the stores that you used to.
You get a little emotional every time you buy clothing from an adult store because you’re used to buying children’s clothes at a third of the price.
You’ve gotten judgmental and strange looks when you’ve ordered off the children’s menu at a restaurant.
You get even more concerned comments from the waiter asking if your food was okay because you asked for a to-go box.
You can never pull off a hair bow because once you put one in your hair, you will literally resemble a toddler.
You get called names like “little one” and “nugget” on a regular basis. These can be cute coming from your boyfriend. From random strangers…not so much.
You probably have a step stool handy for reaching things on the top shelf.
…and, let’s be honest, the middle shelf too.
Heaven forbid you get freckles in the summer. More people than you could possibly imagine will look at you and say “awwwww!”
You’re great at saving money on clothes. Apart from style changes, you haven’t truly needed a new wardrobe in around ten years. Your clothes from middle school still fit perfectly.
Your three-inch heels don’t make you tall. They just make you almost average.
You hear “you’re cute” about one hundred times more often than “you’re sexy.”
You get complaints and side-eye from taller girls every time you date a tall guy. The phrase, “save them for us!” is angrily thrown around.
But you love feeling tiny next to a guy with enormous muscles, so you really don’t care.
Actually, you love feeling tiny in general. Sure, you could have been born 5’5″ but who wants to be normal anyway?
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