If you’re going to do something, you might as well give it 100 percent.
Every friendship and relationship you have, small or meaningful, will teach you something. Make sure to learn from them.
Some of the best nights you’ll have won’t require you to even leave your house. They will include your best friends, sweatpants, and screaming the classics while dancing around. And alcohol, of course.
Proper eyebrow maintenance is next to godliness.
Always become best friends with the bartender.
A great sense of humor will get you further than you think.
Sometimes, you just have to go with the flow.
Emotional baggage is the heaviest luggage a girl can carry. Think about how much you actually want to carry.
A night of sugary drinks will never end well.
Boys are stupid and they will be for the foreseeable future.
There will always be someone who “has it worse,” but that doesn’t mean your problems are meaningless. Stop comparing your shit to other people.
If you can’t stop drunk crying for at least 30 minutes, it’s not a sign to drink more–it’s a sign to go to bed.
Gossiping, complaining, and lying are three ways to ensure no one likes you.
If you can laugh at yourself, you’ve lost the ability to embarrass yourself.
Don’t give other people the power to ruin your day. They’re not worth it.
Some people are in your life for a short time, some for a long time. Don’t lose sight of who’s in what category.
Only the good die young, and the only way to describe how it feels is emptiness. Keep their memories alive and they will be with you forever.
If you have to apologize for being yourself, you need new friends.
Don’t try to figure out life. That’s something for you to tackle in the future.
Yes, it is possible to have 21 shots in one night. It’s not recommended, though.
Life is short and full of misery and changes. Why say no to happiness, spontaneity, and confidence?
Hakuna Moscato (@HakunaMoscato) is a contributing writer for Total Sorority Move. and Post Grad Problems. A born and raised Maryland girl, she's obsessed with the Baltimore Ravens, Old Bay, and anything that has the Maryland flag pattern on it. She's a newly retired student-athlete and sorority girl, but not quite ready to call herself an adult, especially since she still has to be carried out of bars. With a Long Island in hand, she's ready for whatever life is throwing her way. Maybe.